Re: "I will never compare my life to yours. That’s why I’m happy." / by Kevin Davis

Below is my personal reflection based on the article "I will never compare my life to yours. That’s why I’m happy."

 

I adopted this thinking years ago. I was beating myself up because I wasn't as "successful" as some of my friends and associates of the same age, similar upbringing, and background.

Some of my friends finished college in 4 years, some of them had great internships before graduation, some of them had great jobs right out of college, some of them earned advanced degrees years ago, some of them have been in their chosen career path or field for going on 15 years, some of them never got divorced, some of them are celebrating 15 years of marriage, some of them are heads of divisions or companies, some of them have more money in their retirement savings, some of them have great relationships with their spouses, some of them are half-way through their mortgages, some of them are on their 2nd or 3rd passport, some of them just seem to have it all together.

We are raised to follow typical or expected trajectory of those within our peer groups. But the more I live, the more I find that while others have things you wish you had  achieved the success you hoped to have at the same time as your friends, they want some of what you have.

I posted a meme the other day that said something to the effect of "what messes us up the most is the image of how it is supposed to be".

I stopped measuring myself by my friends' success and achievements. There is a difference between having a goal and being envious. I ambitious, but based on my own successes from where I was, where I am, and where I want to be. It's ok to want more than what you have, but don't let that dictate your life or let it become an obsession which fuels self-doubt, depression, etc.

The hardest part of being an adult is understanding and accepting that your life is not going to be the way you'd like, and you have to play the hand you are dealt and make the best of it for you and/or your family and friends.